- Richard J Bell
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Print: Creative Memoir: Revolution of the Artistic Prescription - Reconnect
Revolution Of Artistic Prescription
by Richard J Bell
In the artistic revolution of the mental health system, where my conflict between creativity and health is fought, ink-stained tear drops blot the pages as I think, what could I have become, or if I would be anywhere if it wasn’t for artistic devices leading to wellness.
Picking up a paintbrush to hand me a script for wellness, I remember a health worker of mine stating, 'You know, most of my clients study art.'
My reaction at the time was, 'So I come first in my class in science from years seven to ten, to get four B’s in my year ten certificate to do art?’
Rebelling against the artistic revolution, I fought the mental health system to study a Certificate IV in Laboratory Techniques.
After having more than one health worker throw a grenade into my hopes and dreams shattering the ideas to pieces. I fought in the revolution to conquer my own hopes of becoming a scientist.
The attitudes I had to fight against, weren’t in line with my personal goals, when I stated I wanted to be employed again, I’d be met with opposing attitudes.
‘But, what would happen to your pension?’ asked the psychologists. ‘What if you got sick?’
‘For stability of income,’ I chanted throwing my fist in the air.
Then I tell them I got first in my year for science from Year Seven until Year Ten, trying to explain to deaf ears, that all they saw was a stereotyped disabled person.
‘Ha! Are you sure, your smart enough?’ the Case Worker would ask. ‘For the recognition of intelligence,’ marching onwards to their disregard of past achievements.
Frustrated by these conditions imposed on me by health system workers, they would ask, ‘Why do you even want to work again?”
‘For the hopes of a better lifestyle,’ I said in a rebellion of my own agenda.
Marching to the rhythm of my drum, I completed my Certificate IV in Laboratory Techniques in 2018, despite the attitude of health workers.
Reflecting on the mission I conquered, I came to realise it took me four years but should have only taken me a year and a half to finish the course. From 2008 until 2019, I have been trying to finish a TAFE course, every year, but failed to complete the mission. Looking at my past history of failure Laboratory Techniques was the only course I ever tried hard to finish.
The past, I failed missions of my revolutionary attempts, attending one day, or a week at most, and my agenda to finish a certificate had become frustrating.
But, was my health in order, to complete such a mission in the revolution against attitudes? Or was it that I wasn’t overthrowing the attitudes imposed on me, but following my heart, that I got my health together to complete the course?
In the reflection on my war-torn battlefield of attitudes from the health workers. I look back constructively to decide whether art and writing, actually helped.
Remembering a seminar that I once presented in, became aware that maybe I needed art, to create wellness.
‘Look at that,’ said the room of general practitioners. ‘They can reach a recovery.’
‘Yeah it took me seven years to get to the level I am now,' I replied.
'No, you don't get it, do you?' they asked. 'People who get as sick as you do, end up in homes for the mentally ill. And never come out again.'
‘What did you do, that others don’t?’ another general practitioner asked.
With no idea that when I had my relapse, talking to myself from the point I woke until I slept, with hallucinations coming out of my mouth, I was unwell enough to end up in a home for the mentally ill and never come out again.
‘Apart from my hallucinations stopping coming out of my mouth, whenever I was around anyone, I immersed myself in art, writing and watching movies,' I told them.
So it was creativity that lead me on a path to wellness, which was something that I didn’t realise before. I remember on my journey to get better, being submerged in writing. Pages and pages of handwritten poetry, filling books upon books, just to get the symptoms to lesson. To be able to get where I am today in 2021.
Then remembered on my journey, my psychiatrist in a conversation about recovery-orientated practices saying, 'Small achievements that can be built upon can lead to a successful recovery.’
The journey of up throwing the paint brushes and artistic prescription slip, that was imposed on me, it had actually helped me come into wellness. It helped me create achievements, that lead to being published, and that created books, opinion pieces and memoirs. After finishing a poem, I could get out of bed instead of lying in bed with major depression symptoms for ten hours a day, it was the artistic prescription slip, that helped me in the long run. I had no idea, that I would have ended up in a home for the mentally ill.
Now again, I am on my journey toward considering my future endeavours, and whether art and writing will get me there in the long run, or will I continue on to become a scientist? Uncertain about what the future holds I will continue to hold the artistic prescription slip in my hand, knowing where it has brought me.